Image:Barb Kautz
About Teenagers, With and Without Feathers
In the early spring a pair of birds built a nest in an old gray, bike helmet hanging on the wall of our garage. Next to it hangs another bike helmet, this one with a pink visor, too old, and too small for my 17 year old granddaughter to use.
A few days later the female bird lay four eggs. The pair took turns searching for meals while the other bird sat on the eggs. About two weeks later three of the four eggs hatched. When the birds seemed to have flown the nest the mother laid a second foursome of eggs. Meanwhile, more birds—or was it the original pair?—built a second nest in the second helmet.
One afternoon, I sat in the garage waiting for Jim so we could go out to dinner. While I waited, I was entertained by a bird I thought was not yet fully grown hovering on the edge of the gray helmet. It jumped back and forth between the two helmets, flew out of the garage, back into it, then from one helmet to another. Over and over again. I wasn’t sure whether or not there were still babies in the gray helmet. It seemed as though the bird would not return to its nest.
The bird reminded me of teenagers. Testing their wings then flying home, not quite ready or able to fly. Ready to leave school. Or not. I’d been living with a new high school graduate and raised her mother, aunt, and uncle. So whether or not I was correct about the bird’s age it made me laugh.
When I was a young parent I knew enough about growth and development not to be overly concerned by my teenagers’ testing of wings. I wonder, though, about Joseph and Mary. Luke’s Gospel describes Jesus chiding his parents for not understanding why they thought he was lost when they left Jerusalem. He wasn’t concerned. Accounts of Jerusalem under Roman rule rightfully give credence to Mary and Joseph’s fears. Jesus’s reply, asking them why they didn’t understand he was in his father’s house has always seemed a little cheeky to me. Just like that of a teenager.
And like most of us, Joseph and Mary, forgive and forget their son. Or should it be, that we like Joseph and Mary, most of us forgive and forget our teenagers, hoping they’ll fly at the proper time.
Barb Kautz
August, 2025